17 Clear Indicators of Dishonesty in a Relationship

Written By Dave Spencer

We all deserve to be treated with respect in our relationships, especially in our romantic relationships. Frequently being dishonest with your partner is an easy way to make them feel untrusting, unappreciated, and disrespected. If you’re worried your partner isn’t being entirely truthful, we’ve got you covered. Here are 17 clear indicators of dishonesty in a relationship.

Sudden Changes in Communication Patterns

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Communication is incredibly important in all relationships, ensuring both parties feel understood and respected. If your partner has suddenly or gradually reduced the quality of their communication or the amount of time they spend talking to you, this can be a sign that they are hiding something.

Unexplained Absences or Schedule Changes

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As noted by Prevention, partners who are having affairs or doing other things behind their partners’ backs will often spend long periods of time away from home with little explanation. Their excuses may often seem strange and suspicious, such as sudden business trips or new hobbies that make little sense.

Changes in Financial Habits

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Does it seem like your partner suddenly has a lot of unusual incoming or outgoing expenses? If so, it’s possible they may be hiding something. It’s important that partners are on the same page when it comes to their finances, so it is often dishonest and disrespectful to make large financial investments behind their backs.

Overly Defensive Behavior

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According to Verywell Mind, when you offer a dishonest partner feedback or ask clarifying questions about their actions, they are likely to become defensive or aggressive. For example, they may accuse you of being jealous or distrusting, attacking you for your concerns.

Avoidance of Certain Topics or People

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Does it seem like your partner has suddenly become more uncomfortable when certain people or topics are brought up? If so, this could be a sign that there is something about that person or subject they’re not telling you.

Increased Concern with Appearance

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People who suddenly become more concerned with aspects of their appearance, such as their wardrobe or grooming habits, often do so because they have a new romantic interest in their life. If your partner suddenly seems more interested in improving their looks, you may want to have a conversation with them about why this is.

Password Secrecy and Device Guarding

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It’s healthy to maintain a degree of privacy in relationships. However, if it seems like your partner is suddenly being more secretive about their passwords and devices, this could indicate that they are hiding something from you.

Inconsistencies in Stories or Details

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People who are dishonest often have a hard time keeping track of all their lies. For this reason, you may notice strange inconsistencies in the stories or facts they are telling you. This can be especially concerning if they usually have a good memory when it comes to recalling stories and events.

Lack of Eye Contact

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A lack of eye contact isn’t always a sign of dishonesty. However, if it seems like your partner usually has no problem maintaining eye contact except around certain topics, this can be a sign that there is something about the subject that they are not being honest about. According to Business Insider, staring at someone intensely without blinking can also be a sign of deception.

Overcompensation in Affection or Gifts

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We all love getting gifts from our boyfriends or girlfriends. However, when your partner suddenly increases their affection or gives you many unexpected gifts for seemingly no reason, this can be a way for them to alleviate their guilt for something they are being dishonest about.

Withdrawal from Shared Activities

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Shared hobbies and activities are great for couples to spend quality time together and connect. When one partner suddenly seems to lose interest in these activities or prioritizes other social events, this can be a sign of dishonesty or infidelity.

Uncharacteristic Jealousy or Accusations

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People who cheat or overstep boundaries will sometimes project their dishonesty onto their partner, accusing them of lying or being unfaithful. If your partner suddenly seems to be questioning your loyalty or truthfulness for no clear reason, they may be being dishonest with you.

Sudden Interest in New Hobbies Without Inclusion

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It’s healthy for everyone to pursue new hobbies or interests. However, when someone in a relationship suddenly becomes obsessed with a new interest but shows no desire for their partner to get involved, this can be a sign that they are hiding something and using the hobby as an excuse.

Excessive Privacy Around Certain Aspects of Life

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It’s healthy for partners to hold on to their own privacy and independence in some aspects of life. However, if they seem to be needlessly secretive about certain people, hobbies, or things, this can indicate that they are worried you’ll discover something they’re hiding.

Frequent Use of Absolutes in Denials

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Dishonest partners will often use absolutes in phrases such as “I will always” or “I would never” in an attempt to overcompensate for their dishonest behaviors. While not everyone who uses these phrases is being dishonest, you may want to consider whether more of their behaviors could indicate dishonesty.

Changes in Language or Speech Patterns

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People who lie will often become more uncomfortable and nervous when they are saying something untruthful. As such, you may notice that they begin stammering, frequently pausing, speeding up, or slowing down their speech when talking about certain topics.

Physical Signs of Discomfort

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A dishonest person’s nervousness about telling lies can also manifest through physical signs of discomfort. For example, they might start blinking rapidly, breathing more quickly or heavily, or touching their face more often.