19 Things Everyone Needs to Know Before Tying the Knot

Written By Lisa Marley

Marriage is supposed to be a happy stage of your life. Sadly, it’s not all about dresses and flowers, as there’s a lot of work that goes into having a successful marriage. In this article, we look at a few things you need to know before tying the knot.

Discuss Financial Goals and Plans

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Starting a conversation about money can help ensure you’re both on the same financial page before tying the knot. You need to know how you both feel about debt management, budgeting, and savings. The Independent says finances are the leading cause of divorce, so you don’t want to skip this one.

Understand Each Other’s Expectations

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You need to know what to expect from each other when it comes to career goals, family planning, and personal and shared priorities. This will help prevent misunderstandings and conflicts later on. This way, you don’t get caught off guard when your partner makes certain decisions.

Know Each Other’s Family Dynamics

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Unfortunately, family matters more than we would like to admit when it comes to marriage. First, you need to understand the relationship your partner has with their parents and siblings. You also need to know more about their family traditions and values. Most importantly, doing this step will help you navigate your relationship with your in-laws.

Consider Premarital Counseling

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Counseling is a great way to strengthen your relationship and address any concerns before getting married. Do some research to find the right counselor for you and your partner. The Gottman Institute recommends only using a counselor who specializes in therapy for couples, not just anyone.

Talk About Household Responsibilities

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Dividing chores and daily tasks can cause more trouble than you’d expect. Unmet expectations for home maintenance and organization will result in conflict if not discussed beforehand. Unless you can hire people to do everything for you, the housework must be shared.

Address Communication Styles

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Good communication means sharing thoughts clearly and listening to each other. It helps to know how to talk during happy times and how to sort out problems when they come. Listening is also key. It shows you care about what your partner feels and thinks.

Plan for the Future Together

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Planning your future together ensures that you both have shared goals and aspirations.  Talk about what you both want in the future, like where you want to live, saving money for when you’re older, and how you want to raise your kids. This way, you both know what to expect and work toward the same things.

Understand the Legal Implications of Marriage

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Getting married isn’t just about the party; it changes things legally, too. This includes your legal status, who owns what, and if you need agreements in place before getting married. You must understand these things to keep problems away and make sure you both agree on how to handle money and property.

Explore Spiritual and Religious Beliefs

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Discussing your spiritual and religious beliefs can help align your values and practices in marriage. You might follow certain religious ways or think about life in special ways. You should talk about how this fits into your life together, especially in how you’ll raise kids.

Discuss Lifestyle Preferences

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Before getting married, talk about social life and friendships, hobbies and leisure activities, and health and wellness routines. It’s okay if your lifestyles are different and you don’t like the same things. Acknowledging this will help you navigate those differences so they won’t come between you and your partner.

Address Conflict Resolution Strategies

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About 40% of couples say fighting is why they might break up. To fix this, learn how to solve fights without getting too upset. It’s good to meet in the middle sometimes. And if you can’t fix it alone, asking for help from a professional can make things better.

Consider Geographic Location

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Deciding where to live is important, as it affects many aspects of your life together. It’s not just about the house but also being near loved ones and finding good jobs. The right place can make life better for both of you. Think about what each of you needs and wants. A good spot should make you both happy and support your work and personal lives.

Understand Work-Life Balance

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Coursera defines work-life balance as “the amount of time you spend doing your job versus the amount of time you spend with your friends and family and pursuing your personal interests.”  Too much work can hurt relationships, so it’s essential to find a way to do well in your job and also have quality time at home.

Talk About Sex and Intimacy

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Talking about your sex life and being close is key in marriage. It’s about matching what you want and being there for each other. Things change, and that’s okay. Being open and caring can keep the bond strong. Remember, being close in love is about more than just sex; it’s about feeling connected during all intimate moments.

Plan Financial Management

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Here’s a tip: money talks are vital in marriage. Decide if you want shared or separate accounts, how to invest, and how to handle daily costs. Planning financial matters helps avoid unnecessary stress and fights. It’s smart to agree on how you’ll manage money to make sure you’re both okay with the money plan.

Set Boundaries with Friends and Family

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It’s important to have your own space, even when married. This means making rules about privacy and how much family and friends are involved. Good boundaries keep problems away and make sure your marriage stays happy. Talk about what you both need to feel comfortable and respected.

Discuss Parenting Styles

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Agreeing on parenting styles is essential for those planning to have children. Talking about how to raise kids before they come is smart. Think about what matters most in how they grow up, like rules and what they learn outside of home. Being on the same page in parenting helps a lot when the kids arrive.

Evaluate Health and Wellness

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Like the vows say, in sickness and in health. You must prepare yourselves for the worst, as illness can strike at any time. Discuss each other’s fitness and dietary habits to see if you agree on how to approach this. You can imagine how hard it would be for a gym rat to live with a couch potato.

Maintain Personal Independence

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Pursuing individual interests and spending time apart are good signs in a relationship. They encourage personal growth, allowing you to treasure the time you spend together. Bustle says, “It’s essential to have your own sense of autonomy while feeling you can depend on each other. Also, if you give up your independence and abandon the things that used to make you happy, it will be reflected in your relationship.”

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