Most people seem nice initially, but their true personality traits become apparent sooner or later. It can take years before some people show their true colors, and unfortunately, they may not be good. If you want to read people better, here are 19 actions that reveal someone’s true colors.
How They Face Adversity
Everyone has faced adversity in life, whether it be a relationship ending, illness or injury, or a career setback. However, you can tell a lot about a person by how they respond. Do they persevere? Or do they get angry? Adversity tests people and brings out their true selves.
How They Talk to Servers and Store Workers
Servers and store workers usually can’t defend themselves against bad behavior or bullying from customers because they could lose their jobs. That’s why mistreating them is such a black mark on someone’s character. It implies they see servers and workers as inferiors who deserve to be treated as such.
How They Listen
Listening is a crucial life skill that shows respect and self-awareness. According to Psychology Today, people who don’t listen might be ‘talkaholics’ who want to share their own thoughts without hearing anyone else’s. These people usually aren’t team players and show their lack of regard for people in other ways, too.
How They Handle a Crisis
It’s not easy to cope with a crisis, but persistent people are always able to take control of the situation. Those who lash out at others due to stress and pressure probably aren’t nice or reliable people. You can judge a person’s mental strength by how they handle a crisis.
How They Act in Public and Private
Most people are on their best behavior in public because they want to make a good impression. However, their true colors often come out in private. If someone is as friendly behind closed doors as they are in public, they’re a genuine person. If not, they’re using a false public persona to dupe others.
How They Treat Children
Not everybody wants to have their own children; some people don’t even like being around them. But even so, it’s a massive red flag if someone is cruel to children in any way. Children are physically and emotionally vulnerable, so anyone who deliberately mistreats them has dark true colors.
How They Treat Their Partner
Arguments are normal in a relationship, but it’s a red flag if someone is happy to humiliate, denigrate, or disrespect their partner in front of others. Someone who mistreats their partner by making them the butt of a joke or criticizing them to third parties has nasty true colors.
How They React to Boundaries
Boundaries are crucial for helping us identify harmful or threatening behavior. Psych Central warns that people who deliberately violate our boundaries are manipulative, narcissistic, and have a poor sense of self. These people don’t mind making you feel uncomfortable because it puts them in a position of power over you.
How They Take Blame
We’re all human and make mistakes. The actual test of character is how we take the blame for those mistakes. People who play the blame game and refuse to take responsibility have no sense of accountability and pretend to be perfect. Their true colors contrast the performance they put on.
How They Overcome Setbacks
Like crises, setbacks are something we all face in life. Somebody who can persevere and work hard to overcome setbacks knows what they want in life much more than someone who pretends to be in control but refuses to put in the work to progress. As a result, they’re happier and more successful.
How They Respond to Rumors
Rumors hold a lot of power, especially if they’re bad. When people feel pressured by rumors, their true colors often come out and confirm that the gossip about them is true. Defending your reputation without resorting to underhand tactics is the sign of a much more secure person.
How They Give Feedback
Feedback is one of the best tools we can use to improve our personalities, but it must be given constructively. Someone who uses feedback as a way to make digs at people or play mind games isn’t a good person underneath their helpful bravado. They almost certainly have their own agenda.
How They Treat Their Subordinates
You can tell a lot about someone’s personality by how they treat those working under them. Forbes reports that bad bosses regularly overwork their subordinates, take credit for their work, play favorites, and aren’t open to new ideas. A person’s true colors emerge when they have power over others.
How They Behave with Money
As the Bible says, the love of money is the root of all evil. You’ll almost certainly discover someone’s true colors when there’s money involved, such as when a sibling doesn’t care for their parents until a will and inheritance is being decided. The opportunity for financial gain brings out the worst in people.
How They Observe Mistreatment
Sometimes, it’s hard to call out mistreatment when you’re dealing with someone much more powerful, but there’s always something you can do. For example, even if you can’t fire a toxic boss, you can comfort the employee they’ve mistreated. Looking the other way shows a distinct lack of empathy.
How They Drive
There are millions of traffic accidents every year, so you can tell how much someone values their life and the lives of others by how they drive. People who are deliberately reckless by driving too fast, driving drunk, or texting behind the wheel are not good people. Their carelessness and stupidity are often deadly.
How They Act When They’re Drunk
Alcohol lowers inhibitions and makes us lose control of ourselves, so it regularly reveals people’s true colors. Some drunk people become very happy and affectionate, but others become aggressive and argumentative. They generally go back to ‘normal’ when sober, but their drunk behavior shows what they’re really like.
How They Take Rejection
Rejection is a sad fact of life, and it demonstrates much about a person’s personality. According to Verywell Mind, people who struggle with rejection often socially isolate themselves, respond dramatically, and hurt others to protect themselves. This behavior indicates that someone hates not being in control, no matter how nicely they act.
How They Argue
Finally, you can always judge someone’s true colors by how they argue. It can be difficult to keep your cool when you’re frustrated, but someone who takes cheap shots at the other person shows a lack of respect and is likely wrong in the argument. People who keep calm are much more mature.
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