Many everyday phrases seem harmless, but they actually perpetuate sexist stereotypes and outdated gender norms. By understanding the hidden biases in our language, we can make conscious efforts to use more inclusive and respectful terms. Here are 20 common phrases you didn’t know are sexist.
“Man Up”
The BBC reveals that to “man up” is to show “toughness or courage” and “by linking those admirable qualities to men” it’s sexist. This phrase suggests that women can’t or shouldn’t exhibit these qualities. Instead, we should encourage everyone to be strong and brave, regardless of gender.
“Grow a Pair”
When we say “grow a pair,” we’re equating courage with male anatomy. This phrase implies that bravery is tied to being male, which isn’t true. Courage is a human trait, not a gender-specific one. Let’s find better ways to promote bravery that don’t rely on outdated notions.
“Bossy”
If a woman displays leadership qualities, she can then be labelled as “bossy” which reinforces the idea that assertiveness is inappropriate for women. Men in similar positions are often praised as “leaders” or “assertive”, but strong leadership qualities need to be recognized in everyone.
“Like a Girl”
Saying someone does something “like a girl” is often meant as an insult, suggesting weakness or incompetence, and this phrase perpetuates the harmful stereotype that girls are less capable, instead of celebrating all abilities and encouraging everyone to do their best.
“Man Cave”
A personal retreat is often referred to as a “man cave”, suggesting that men need a special space away from women to relax. This phrase implies that men and women have inherently different needs and spaces, rather than the less sexist idea that everyone deserves a personal space to unwind.
“Drama Queen”
The term “drama queen” trivializes the person’s emotions and reinforces the stereotype that women are overly emotional, even if labelling a man with this term. Everyone experiences emotions differently, and it’s unfair to dismiss someone’s feelings based on gender. People’s emotions should be supported through tough times instead.
“Wear the Pants”
“Wearing the pants” in a relationship implies that the person in charge must be dominant and traditionally masculine; this phrase perpetuates the idea that one person must be in control, often the man. Alternatively, society should celebrate relationships where partners share responsibilities and decisions equally.
“Catfight”
Describing a conflict between women as a “catfight” trivializes their disagreements and reduces them to petty squabbles, and this phrase often carries connotations of being entertaining or less serious than conflicts involving men, instead of simply recognizing that all fallouts need to be taken seriously.
“Hysterical”
The word “hysterical” has historical roots in the idea that women’s emotions are irrational and uncontrollable, therefore using this term to describe someone who’s upset can reinforce harmful stereotypes about women’s mental health in place of more neutral language to describe emotional reactions.
“Old Wives’ Tale”
Calling something an “old wives’ tale” suggests that knowledge and wisdom from older women are silly or unfounded, and dismisses valuable insights and experiences simply because of their source. It doesn’t respect and consider wisdom from all ages and genders, recognizing the value in diverse perspectives.
“Boys Will Be Boys”
Bad behavior is often excused with “boys will be boys”, which implies that boys are naturally inclined to act out and shouldn’t be held accountable. This phrase reinforces harmful stereotypes about gender and behavior instead of holding everyone to the same standards.
“Sugar and Spice”
Describing girls as “sugar and spice and everything nice” reinforces the stereotype that girls should be sweet and passive; this phrase therefore limits how girls can express themselves and what they can aspire to be when they should be free from these sexist stereotypes.
“Ball and Chain”
A common way to refer to a spouse, often a wife, is a “ball and chain”’; this suggests that marriage is a burden, particularly for men. This phrase reinforces negative stereotypes about relationships and gender roles instead of talking about partners with respect and appreciation.
“Working Mother”
If you’ve heard the term “working mother”, which highlights a woman’s role as a mother first, you might have wondered why we never hear “working father.” This phrase underscores the expectation that women should balance work and family, often without acknowledging similar expectations for men.
“Lady Boss”
Calling a successful woman a “lady boss” separates her from male leaders, suggesting that being a boss is inherently male. This term can undermine women’s authority by emphasizing their gender over their leadership skills. Instead, let’s simply refer to all leaders as “bosses” or “leaders,” regardless of gender.
“Boys’ Club”
A “boys’ club” suggests that these groups are naturally male-dominated and unwelcoming to women, and this phrase reinforces gender exclusion in various fields, instead of striving for inclusivity. We should focus on creating spaces where both men and women feel welcomed (and valued).
“Nagging”
You’ll mostly hear women labelled as “nagging” simply for voicing concerns or reminding others of responsibilities, and this perpetuates the sexist stereotype that women are bothersome. This term diminishes legitimate concerns and reinforces the idea that women’s voices are less important.
“Throw Like a Girl”
If a man is told that he “throws like a girl”, this is meant as an insult; it implies that girls are inherently less skilled at physical activities. This phrase reinforces negative stereotypes about girls’ abilities in sports and other physical endeavors instead of simply encouraging everybody’s efforts in a non-sexist way.
“Crazy Ex-Girlfriend”
Labeling an ex-partner, especially a woman, as “crazy” trivializes their feelings and experiences, reducing them to a stereotype. This phrase dismisses the complexity of relationships and emotions, and becomes a derogatory term used to describe past relationships that were problematic.
“Maiden Name”
Another common phrase you didn’t know was sexist is “maiden name”, referring to a woman’s surname before marriage, as this emphasizes her marital status and implies that her identity is tied to her husband. This phrase can diminish a woman’s individuality instead of simply saying “birth name”.
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