You may have a few personality traits that you don’t realize might be annoying to the people around you. Sometimes it’s not until you reflect on them that you really understand why. Here are 19 things you do that make people like you less.
Over-Sharing Personal Information
Over-sharing your personal information can make others feel extremely uncomfortable. It’s important not to do this with certain people. Understand your audience and your setting, and reassess whether it’s appropriate. Over-sharing too often can make you appear self-centered or insecure toward others.
Being Overly Negative
According to the Northeast Georgia Physicians Group, “negative thoughts can take over all aspects of our lives. They can affect our relationships with others, cause low self-esteem, and make it harder to get through our day.” Being negative all the time can put a strain on relationships and make people feel pushed away.
Not Actively Listening
If you’re someone who doesn’t actively listen when your friend is talking to you, then you can make them feel unappreciated and undervalued. To be an effective communicator, it’s extremely important to be able to listen. You can simply improve this and show people you’re listening by repeating back in conversation a few things they’ve said.
Constant Complaining
If you’re someone who is constantly complaining, it’s a negative trait, and the likelihood is people don’t enjoy being in your company, as it’s exhausting and can drag them down. If you’re always complaining, people will start to view you as incapable of handling situations.
Failing to Reciprocate
If you’re someone who doesn’t reciprocate in your relationship, then it’s likely that people like you less because of this. It’s an ugly trait to just take and never give back. To maintain healthy relationships, it’s important to reciprocate. This can be simply returning a favor or a compliment.
Always Being Late
Business growth coach Ethan Chazin explains that being late is unprofessional and shows a lack of commitment. Keeping people waiting shows a lack of respect. It can come across that you view yourself as more important and that people should wait for you. A lack of punctuality can cause you to be viewed as unreliable and untrustworthy.
Dominating Conversations
If you’re someone who dominates conversations among others, then it’s a habit you should think about stopping. This shows that you view your words as more important and don’t have an interest in what others have to say. People can see you as arrogant and like you less.
Humblebragging
A 2018 study showed that “humblebragging—defined as ‘bragging masked by a complaint or humility’—actually makes people like you less than straight-up self-promotion,” says Time Magazine. It comes across as insincere and manipulative and actually leads people to resent you and not admire you. Share achievements in a non-boastful way so you don’t come across as arrogant.
Being Too Judgmental
People don’t like people who are judgmental. We should never judge anybody, as we haven’t lived life in their shoes. It can negatively affect someone if they know they’re being judged, damaging their confidence and self-esteem. You wouldn’t like it if someone judged you, so don’t judge another.
Gossiping
Gossiping is talking about people behind their backs in a disrespectful or sometimes slanderous way. It’s something that happens in the playground as children and shouldn’t carry on in adult life. If you’re someone who gossips about others, you’re viewed as untrustworthy, and this will negatively affect your relationships.
Not Offering Praise Where It’s Due
If you’re someone who doesn’t offer praise when it’s due, then you can be seen as bitter. Recognition should always be given when it’s needed, as it’s a positive trait that can motivate the person who’s receiving it. Praise for people can actually help you build connections with others.
Failing to Make Eye Contact
Eye contact is a very important aspect of communicating. If you’re someone who doesn’t make eye contact when someone is talking to you, then you can come across as disinterested in what the person has to say. It immediately reduces any connection you have and can make people feel like they can’t trust you.
Misusing Social Media
Social media is a key part of many people’s lives today, but misusing it can make others view you in a different light. If you’re someone who acts completely differently on social media compared to in person, this can be a concern for others, and they’ll struggle to trust you.
Not Apologizing When Wrong
We’re all humans, and we can all be wrong from time to time. This is agreed upon by Indeed, which states, “There may be situations at work that warrant an apology from you. You may have been late for work, missed an important deadline or displayed uncharacteristic behavior.” If you can’t apologize, then people will definitely like you less.
Invading Personal Space
It’s very important that you never invade someone’s personal space. It’s crucial to respect other people’s physical and emotional boundaries at all times. Encroaching on this will be very disrespectful, and people won’t appreciate your company because of your actions. It’s important to be mindful at all times and respect people the way they’re showing respect to you.
Being Inconsistent
If you’re someone who is inconsistent, then people will struggle to trust you and build meaningful relationships. This may be that you pick and choose when you’re there for your friends. Any unpredictability makes others feel uncomfortable and wary of relying on you in a relationship.
Showing Off
According to PsychMechanics, “A person shows off only when they need to. Only when they think that others don’t consider them important will they try to prove that they’re important.” You come across as someone who is arrogant and craves attention from other people. These actions can separate people from being associated with you.
Failing to Adapt to Feedback
It’s important to listen to and understand important feedback when it comes from someone genuine, as it’s in your best interest. Failing to adapt to the feedback can be off-putting for others, and it can also be detrimental for yourself as it’s an opportunity to grow.
Focusing Only on Yourself
Being someone who only focuses on themselves is a negative trait. Others will view you as self-centered and will keep interactions with you to a minimum. By showing more empathy to others, you’ll see your relationships improve as they become more mutually engaging.
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