It’s important to interact with the right people. You don’t want to spend time and build relationships with people who are toxic, as this has a negative impact on your life. Here are 18 red flags that someone is secretly a toxic person.
They Manipulate Through Mind Games
Higher Perspective reports, “Mind games are the most destructive of all manipulation tactics. They have the power to completely destroy a person from the inside out.” Toxic people often try to hide their true identity and desires. They may try to guilt trip you or make you feel small. They may even do things to make you feel jealous or insignificant.
They Are Excessively Needy and Clingy
A toxic person often appears overly needy and clingy. They can try to make you feel responsible for their emotional well-being. They may isolate you from your family or friends to maintain control but in a way that appears loving, like they just want to be with you all the time.
They Are Constant Attention Seekers
A major red flag for toxic people is their constant need to seek attention. They love to create drama and make everything about them to ensure that they stay in the spotlight at all times. They may exaggerate stories or appear to be fishing for compliments.
They Never Take Responsibility
It’s always a red flag when someone doesn’t take responsibility. A toxic person won’t take accountability for their words or actions. Instead, they often try to shift the blame onto someone else and act as victims. If this is something you notice in someone, you want to avoid them at all costs.
They Violate Personal Boundaries
Toxic people often have no respect for personal boundaries. As mentioned by Honni Hayton, “A toxic person is used to controlling and manipulating you, so they probably will do the same when you set boundaries. It is helpful to expect this and to remain firm.” They may force situations in relationships for their own agenda with no consideration for your boundaries.
They Use Sarcasm as a Weapon
People who are toxic can sometimes use sarcasm as a weapon for many things. They may use it to prevent having to be open and vulnerable. Or even a way to put others down, as this makes them feel better. People who do this only care about their own interests and aren’t people you want to interact with.
They Talk Too Much, Listen Too Little
A red flag that someone may be toxic is that they talk a lot more than they listen. This is because they have no interest in what other people have to say and prefer the attention to be on them and for others to listen to what they have to say instead.
They Can’t Stand Sharing the Spotlight
A clear red flag that a person is toxic is their need to be the only one in the spotlight. They can’t stand sharing the spotlight, as this means the attention can be on someone else and not themselves. They get jealous, and this can often appear in conversations when they have to redirect it back to themselves.
They Speak Poorly About Others
A red flag that someone isn’t a nice person is when they speak poorly about someone else. Toxic people will often do this to try to make themselves look better. They will spread rumors and lies about others behind their backs and never speak positively.
They Take, Take, Take and Never Give
If you know someone who is always taking and never giving back, then they’re toxic. This shows they’re selfish and will often exploit other people’s generosity. They will happily drain all your time and energy and often expect you to do things for them for their own personal benefit.
They Hold Grudges and Refuse to Forgive
Toxic people often never forgive and move forward; instead, they hold a grudge for life. According to Next Avenue, long-held grudges lead to resentment, which in turn can become toxic. If you spot this trait in another person, you want to avoid interacting with them, as nothing positive will come of it.
They Belittle Your Achievements
A toxic person struggles to accept other people’s achievements. They will try to downplay them or change the subject to themselves, as they’re jealous of your successes. These people will never be happy for you and instead will try to lower your confidence in every way possible.
They Expect You to Read Their Mind
A red flag that toxic people possess is their expectation for people to read their minds. They will often blame you for not knowing things that they have never told you. They will try to make you feel bad for not meeting their unknown needs.
They Make You Feel On Edge
Psychology Today reports, “The constant tension and anxiety you experience from a toxic person affects your mind and body. Constant criticism and belittlement can erode self-confidence, making you feel worthless, anxious, and depressed.” They can be good at creating an environment where you feel anxious.
They Have a History of “Crazy” Exes
If you’re dating someone and they’re discussing a number of ‘crazy’ exes, then it’s more than likely they’re the toxic ones, and it would be wise to avoid them. They will describe others as problematic and not accept any kind of responsibility.
They Idealize and Then Devalue You
Toxic people have been known to idealize you and, within the blink of an eye, devalue you. They will start off with intense admiration, giving you compliments and flattering you. Then, shortly after, they will criticize you and devalue you for no apparent reason.
They Are Easily Bored and Restless
A not-so-obvious red flag that a person is toxic is that they get easily bored and restless. They struggle to spend time alone and instead need constant stimulation from others. They may require attention from you all the time and hint for compliments to make them feel better.
They Show a Pattern of Superficial Relationships
Toxic people often struggle to hold down any kind of relationship. Whether it’s friendships or romantic relationships, this is usually because others begin to understand who they truly are and remove them from their lives. Toxic people themselves can also move on from relationships themselves when they no longer receive the attention they require.
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