In a world that often feels exclusively designed for extroverts, it can be difficult for introverts to get through their daily lives without feeling exhausted or overwhelmed. However, we can all make their lives easier by not pressuring them into certain activities and events. This list reveals 19 things most introverts don’t want to do and why we shouldn’t make them.
Attend Large Social Gatherings
While introverts can sometimes feel ready to come out of their shell and attend social events, large social gatherings are usually very overwhelming and draining for them. For this reason, you should never pressure or guilt them into participating. Instead, they typically prefer small gatherings with close friends who they feel comfortable around.
Engage in Small Talk
Small talk may feel fun and casual for extroverts, but for introverts, it can be surprisingly exhausting. As noted by Forbes, they often see it as superficial and pointless and may find it difficult to come up with things to say. Deeper conversations usually come more naturally to them, so it’s better to skip to the good stuff when possible.
Be the Center of Attention
A lot of extroverts love nothing more than being in the spotlight with all eyes on them. But for most introverts, this sounds like a nightmare. Things like public speaking or being personally called upon in a meeting or event can cause significant stress, anxiety, and overwhelm.
Make Phone Calls
Many people find that phone calls are the quickest and easiest way to communicate something. But it’s important to keep in mind that not everyone feels this way, especially when it comes to phone-shy introverts. Being called unexpectedly can feel stressful and anxiety-inducing, especially when they don’t know what the call will be about. This is why they tend to prefer texts, emails, or planned calls that they can mentally prepare for.
Networking Events
Networking events can be useful for developing professionally and socially. However, this is unlikely to be enough to tempt an introvert to attend them. Most introverts find networking to be forced, superficial, and incredibly draining. They feel like they have to make inauthentic small talk and put on a front to impress those around them.
Be Interrupted
According to Verywell Mind, most introverts need plenty of uninterrupted alone time to reflect, recharge, and focus on their daily tasks. Frequent interruptions can really take them out of their flow state, leading to a decrease in productivity and overall well-being. As such, it’s best to leave them alone when they’re relaxing or working on something, asking beforehand if you want to visit or do something with them.
Participate in Group Activities
Group activities can be fun and help build social bonds. However, they can also feel very intimidating and stressful for introverts, as they typically come with a lot of socialization with several different people. Given the choice, they’ll usually opt for smaller collaborations or independent work.
Unexpected Visits
If you’re thinking of paying an introvert a visit, you should definitely tell them in advance. Introverts like to feel ready and mentally prepared to socialize, and unexpected visits allow no time for this. By asking them if it’s okay to come over in advance, you’ll help them feel more comfortable and respected.
Loud Environments
As noted by All About Introverts, introverts tend to be significantly more sensitive to noise than extroverts. For this reason, loud noises and places can be very stressful and overstimulating for them, especially when combined with lots of people. It’s better to meet them in quiet, peaceful places without too many people around.
Forced Socialization
You should never make an introvert feel pressured or forced to socialize with others, especially with strangers at large events or gatherings. They don’t want to be the center of attention and will usually prefer to meet just one or two new people at a time, allowing for more meaningful interactions and connections.
Feel Pressured to Talk
Similarly, introverts don’t appreciate being pressured into talking more than they’re comfortable with. They tend to need more time and space to start opening up and participating in conversations, so you should give them as much time as they need to think and listen.
Engage in Office Politics
Some people love to gossip, especially in work environments. But introverts are less likely to enjoy these conversations, finding them pointless, superficial, and draining. Instead, they usually prefer direct communication, honesty, and transparency, which allows them to get on with their work without worrying about how others may perceive them.
Attend Long Meetings
Long meetings can feel tiring and intimidating for anyone, but they’re especially exhausting for introverts. Short meetings can feel significantly more bearable, but most of the time they’d prefer for as much information as possible to be communicated via emails or messages, reducing the amount of time required for socialization.
Share Personal Information
As mentioned previously, introverts need plenty of time to open up and feel more comfortable with people. Therefore, it’s important that those around them respect their boundaries and don’t make them feel pressured to share too many personal details about their lives before they feel ready.
Be Criticized for Quietness
Sadly, most introverts can relate to the experience of being criticized or called out for being quiet. There’s nothing wrong with being quieter than other people, and as noted by Psychology Today, it can actually be a strength in helping them listen, reflect, and take in more information. Telling someone they’re “too quiet” can also make them feel misunderstood and like they’re not allowed to be themselves around you.
Participate in Public Speaking
Public speaking can feel extremely stressful and overwhelming for introverts, especially in front of large crowds and strangers. For this reason, you shouldn’t make them feel pressured to speak in front of more people than they’re comfortable with. When possible, it’s better to stick to small gatherings that can help them feel more confident and willing to speak.
Engage in Conflicts
It’s rare for people to enjoy conflicts, but they can be particularly overwhelming and stressful for introverts. While it’s important to speak up about interpersonal issues, introverts appreciate it when this is done in a calm and respectful way. Heated debates and confrontations can quickly make them feel too drained, stressed, and anxious to continue engaging.
Receive Unexpected Phone Calls
Like unannounced visits, unexpected phone calls can disturb an introvert’s flow state and concentration, sometimes causing significant stress and anxiety in the process. They typically prefer to primarily communicate via emails or text messages and for phone calls to be scheduled in advance.
Be Around Loud People
Some people are naturally louder and more outgoing than others, and that’s okay. But introverts can find it more difficult to be around these types of people for long periods of time, as they’re more sensitive to loud sounds than others. Therefore, it’s best not to force them into these kinds of social situations and allow them to step away if necessary.
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