19 Things You Should Never Do At Someone Else’s Wedding

Written By Lisa Marley

It’s such an honor to be invited to a wedding, but there are quite a lot of things to remember when it comes to how to act. If you’re wondering how to act like the perfect wedding guest, here are 19 things you shouldn’t do at other people’s weddings.

Wear White

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This is particularly true for women, but really, all guests should avoid wearing white to someone else’s wedding. And it’s not just white – according to Vogue, “the no-white rule also applies to cream, ivory, beige, and all of the above.” Unless you’re specifically told to wear white, stick to other colors.

Bring Uninvited Plus-Ones

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Guests don’t always realize that the bride and groom literally have to pay for every person who attends their wedding – particularly if there’s an open bar. If you’re thinking about bringing someone to the wedding who’s not on your invitation – just don’t.

Use Your Phone During the Ceremony

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Get that phone on silent as soon as you enter the ceremony space. We’re talking no vibrations, no noise, no nothing. In fact, you should probably turn the whole thing off! The last thing you want is to be the person whose phone disrupts the ceremony, the shame just isn’t worth it.

Get Too Drunk

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Now, we all like to have a good time at weddings – and naturally it’s encouraged! However, if your drunk antics start leading to any inappropriate behavior, particularly if they take the attention away from the bride and groom, you’re going to be in trouble. Just stay within your limits, and you’ll be fine.

Give an Unplanned Speech

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Rocking up to the mic and giving an unplanned speech is a huge wedding faux pas. No matter how much you’d like to have your say, we can’t stress this enough – do not get involved with the speeches! Weddings are planned down to a tee; only those scheduled to speak should make a toast.

Criticize the Wedding Details

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Sure, you might have your own opinions on how the wedding has been decorated, but it’s best to keep these to yourself. So much planning goes into weddings that the bride and groom are likely going to feel quite protective over everything – your criticisms will not be welcome!

Propose to Your Partner

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Ok, so we’ve all seen those videos online where someone proposes at another couple’s wedding – but according to The Knot, this is really best to avoid. Unless the proposal was actually suggested by the bride and groom, wait for another backdrop for your engagement story.

Wear Inappropriate Clothing

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Try to avoid outfits that are too revealing, don’t fit with the theme, or are overly flashy. It’s totally understandable that you want to look good, but you don’t want to be accused of trying to steal the show. Also, if the wedding is outside, consider your footwear carefully.

Bring a Large Gift

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It’s natural to get excited about going to a wedding and want to celebrate the occasion by bringing a large gift; however, I’m sorry to say that most couples won’t actually appreciate this. When it comes to presents, follow the list on the registry and send large items directly to their home address.

Arrive Late or Leave Early (Without Good Reason)

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Unless you have agreed with the bride and groom that you will be arriving late or leaving early, stick to the times on your invite. If you walk into the ceremony 20 minutes after it started, you’re not going to be popular.

Ignore the Seating Arrangements

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Couples tend to spend a lot of time (and I mean a lot of time!) working on their wedding’s seating plan. According to The Madison Event Centre, these are generally designed to promote a good social atmosphere. So, even if you’re tempted to switch places, it’s best not to mess with these arrangements.

Assume You Can Bring Children

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Make sure to have a really good look at your invite and any other information you’ve got relating to the wedding to see if it’s adults-only. This isn’t unusual for weddings, and if the bride and groom have gone down this route, then make sure to leave the kids at home!

Perform a Grand Gesture

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Don’t get carried away with the idea of performing a grand gesture for the happy couple – you might have wondered about singing a song, reciting some poetry, or doing a dance for them, but this is best left for another time. Let the bride and groom have the spotlight on their big day.

Forget to RSVP

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As soon as your invitation arrives, check your calendar for availability and send your RSVP back to the wedding couple. If you forget to RSVP, you’ll cause the bride and groom a real headache as they try to plan the day.

Bring a Casual Date

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Even if you’ve got a +1 on your wedding invite, it’s best to only bring a serious partner. Weddings are such personal events; they can really disrupt the flow of the day to add a stranger to the mix. Plus, if you break up – your ex will be in the wedding photos.

Ignore Cultural Traditions

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It’s not unusual to be invited to weddings that involve cultural practices that might be a bit unfamiliar – it’s no big deal, though. The New York Times suggests simply taking a bit of time to research the basics before you go. Try to participate in traditions as invited, and ask respectful questions if you need a bit of help.

Hog the Photographer

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You probably want to get some good pictures of yourself at the wedding; this is totally fine—after all, we don’t often get the chance to be professionally photographed! However, it’s important to let the photographer focus on the bride and groom and only ask for a couple of photos if appropriate.

Talk Over Speeches

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Speeches at weddings can be pretty entertaining, and they can also get a bit rowdy. Even so, you should try to remain as quiet as possible when others are speaking; the bride and groom must be able to focus on the sentiments being shared!

Make a Scene

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Keep any drama away from the wedding. If, for example, you find yourself having an argument with your partner, either handle it away from other guests or wait until you get home. The last thing you want is to make a scene and have it disrupt the wedding for everyone.

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