The things we go through as children leave a lasting impression on us and go on to make us who we are, but what happens when these experiences are negative? We are going to look at 18 traits that people who were once bullied often share.
Strong Empathy
As a direct consequence of having been bullied when they were younger, these people tend to go on to develop a higher sense of empathy for others, easily able to put themselves in their shoes and feel their pain. They’re far more likely to offer help, knowing far too well what it’s like to need it.
Low Self-Esteem
Bullying can take many forms, from physical to mental to even a mix of the two. When a person has been mentally abused for an extended period of time, the repetition of negative messages can lead to the victim having low self-esteem states, Mapping Ignorance.
Sensitivity to Criticism
People who have been victims of bullying often go on to develop a higher sensitivity to criticism. They can feel attacked when criticized, leading to them feeling like they’re not enough.
People-Pleasing Tendencies
Something that we often see in those who’ve been bullied is that they then go on to become people-pleasers. They will do anything they can to avoid conflict and find acceptance. These people will often go to great lengths to make sure that those around them are happy, regardless of the personal expense.
Not Wanting to Stand Out
As they’ve learned in the past that standing out is normally a bad thing, they try not to call attention to themselves later in life. This can lead to them having fewer opportunities than their peers and missing out on key life experiences.
Overthinking
Constantly overanalyzing situations and interactions is common in people who have been victims of bullying in the past. According to Get Marlee, a direct result of not being able to control being bullied, they try to think about every possible aspect so that they can try and control their future.
Trust Issues
Once someone has been bullied, it becomes harder for them to form close relationships later on in life, as their experiences from their childhood make it hard to see the good in people. Having trust issues can negatively affect these people in their lives as they are not able to form deep and meaningful relationships.
Conflict Avoidance
People who have been bullied often develop a strong dislike for conflict and go out of their way to avoid it in order to maintain peace. This can lead to passive-aggressive behavior and keeping feelings to themselves.
Hypervigilance
Being in a constant state of unease is not good for the body or mind, but it is a state that victims of bullying often find themselves in later life. They are very aware of others around them and what they are doing as a result of what they have gone through in the past, always keeping an eye out for a potential threat.
Introversion
As a result of bullying, the victim often turns inwards, informs Very Well Family. This can serve as a great protective mechanism, but in the long run, it can have a negative effect on the person as it reduces their chances of having incredible social experiences.
Self-Deprecating Humor
Self-deprecating humor is normally a very clear sign of someone who is trying to deflect attention or reduce the pain that they feel. By making the joke about themselves before anyone else can, they think they can stop it from hurting them. This does have the downside of not allowing others to see the person’s true value and strengths.
Creativity
Whether they use it as a means of escape or self-expression, many bullied people tend to channel their experiences into creative outlets such as writing, art, or music. This allows them to express themselves productively while effectively communicating their emotions at the same time.
Increased Social Awareness
Bullying can make someone more aware of social relationships and power structures, which others might not notice. This increased awareness can be both a benefit and a downside, as it may also lead to more anxiety.
Difficulty Accepting Compliments
Accepting compliments can be a difficult thing if you believe that you honestly don’t deserve them, and this is the case for people who have been victims of bullying. As they have developed a negative self-perception, it becomes difficult to accept praise or compliments, as they feel they don’t deserve them (even if they really do.)
Strong Moral Compass
Due to having experienced such treatment at a young age, a bullied person develops a strong sense of what is right and what is wrong. This makes them act with integrity and fairness when interacting with other people.
Defensive Posture
Being quick to defend themselves, even in non-hostile situations, is very common among people who have suffered bullying. This is a direct consequence of the times when they felt like they always needed to be ready to defend themselves against anything and everything.
Struggling to Set Boundaries
A confident person has no issues setting up boundaries and letting other people know about them, but the case is quite the opposite for those who’ve been picked on. Wondermind suggests that identifying these triggers from childhood, can then help the person to set healthy boundaries in adulthood.
Loyalty
When they were younger, they learned that there were very few people in this world that they could trust. Because of this, when they feel a connection with someone, they become very loyal to them, making them value friends and loved ones.
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