What to Say When Someone Doesn’t Respect Your Space

Written By Lisa Marley

There are some people who just don’t seem to know how to respect our personal boundaries. It’s really important to be able to ask for more physical and personal space if you need it. Here are 19 things you can say to someone who isn’t respecting your space.

“Please Knock Before Entering”

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According to Calm, establishing physical boundaries helps us feel safe; this means it’s really important to feel like people won’t suddenly invade your physical space without warning. Asking someone to knock before entering your room or office is setting a clear physical boundary, and it’s one that should be respected.

“I Need Some Space Right Now”

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Simple but effective – telling someone that you need space is a great way to take a bit of a ‘time out’ from a situation and gain some clarity. The other person shouldn’t take this personally, and if they do – that’s another issue. It’s really healthy to be able to express a need for personal space.

“Please Step Back a Bit”

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The key here is to be polite but firm. In this way, you’re expressing your need for physical space without getting annoyed, which could escalate the situation. Most people will realize their mistake and do as you’ve asked.

“I’m Not Comfortable with This”

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Saying “I’m not comfortable with this” can be used in both physical and emotional situations; it’s an effective way to clearly show your discomfort. If you’re talking to a loved one, you might decide to provide a brief explanation, but remember that you don’t need to have a reason.

“Can We Talk About This Later?”

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Needing a bit of time to calm down and get your thoughts in order is not the same as avoiding a conversation altogether. You can set a time with the other person to revisit the topic, so you’re not running away, just rescheduling for a better time.

“I Appreciate Your Concern, But I Need to Handle This Alone”

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It’s difficult when people are trying to help you, but you know that you need to deal with the situation by yourself. The best tactic here is to be kind but firm; show that you’re grateful to the other person for offering to help, but emphasize that you’ve got it under control.

“Let’s Keep a Bit More Distance, Please”

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If someone has overstepped the mark, either physically or emotionally, asking to keep some distance is a polite way to get your boundaries back in check. Verywell Health points out that “setting boundaries is a key part of staying mentally healthy”, so it’s important to calmly ask for space when you need it.

“I Need Some Time to Think About This”

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You don’t need to feel pressured into making decisions, so telling the other person that you need some time to think is a good way to clear your head. As long as you make it clear that you will get back to the other person once you’re ready, this is a very healthy way to ask for space.

“I’d Prefer Not to Discuss This Topic”

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This is one of those phrases that is much-loved by celebrities doing interviews, and you can see why – it’s effective yet inoffensive. No one can get mad at you for simply saying that you don’t want to discuss something, and if they do, that’s definitely not your fault.

“This Is a Private Matter”

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A polite way of saying, “Keep your nose out of my business!” It’s funny how people feel so entitled sometimes, believing that they have the right to know all your private goings-on. Well, funnily enough, that’s not the case – so use this phrase to tell them firmly but politely to respect your privacy.

“I’m Working on Something Important”

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Sometimes, we really don’t want to be disturbed, and this is especially true when we’re right in the middle of something. As Medical News Today explains, it can be much harder to enter a flow state when there are lots of distractions, so it’s important that people know when to give you space.

“Let’s Take a Break from This Conversation”

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If emotions are running high, sometimes the best thing to do is take a time out; however, asking for this can be challenging. Simply suggesting a break from the conversation is a polite, inoffensive way to put a pin in the discussion – you can come back to it when emotions have cooled down!

“I Need Some Quiet Time”

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Our lives can be so noisy and chaotic that it can be hard to find a moment to have some peace. If you just need a little bit of quiet time, you can use this phrase to take a step out of the situation. It will help the people around you see that you just need a bit of space.

“Can We Keep Some Distance for Health Reasons?”

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If your relationship with someone is affecting your mental health, or you are nervous about passing on an illness, this is a clear way to ask for space. You can give the other person a bit more detail if you’d like, but the benefit of this phrase is that it’s pretty self-explanatory.

“I’m Feeling Overwhelmed Right Now”

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Feeling overwhelmed? Let the other person know! There’s no weakness in expressing your emotions; in fact, Forbes talks about the benefit of being able to speak freely about how we’re feeling. Other people should be able to understand when certain emotions mean you need space.

“I Need to Be Alone Right Now”

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We all have times when we just need to be alone, and this doesn’t have to affect our relationship with the other person. If you want some time to yourself, saying that you need to be alone should make things pretty clear.

“Please Respect My Boundaries”

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It’s a valuable skill to be able to recognize when someone is crossing one of your boundaries. If you can see this happening, be clear and ask them to be more respectful. You can explain which specific boundary is being crossed and how they could avoid this if you think that will help.

“This Is My Personal Space”

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Some people will probably be completely unaware that they’ve entered your personal space, so simply stating the facts might be enough to get them to change their ways. It’s good to set a solid boundary about what is your personal space; this way, there will be no confusion in the future.

“I Need to Focus on Myself Right Now”

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In relationships, it can be easy to lose yourself when you’re giving so much to your partner. If you can see this happening, tell them that you need to focus on yourself for a while for a bit of self-care. Simply ask for their understanding and let them know that it’s temporary.

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